Welcome 2018!

We have a tradition in the Martin family. Each New Year's Day we all meet at Grandma's house and spend the day together. Keith has 5 brothers, all are married, all have children. Some of his nieces and nephews are married and some of them have children. When everyone is there it is around 50 people. This year his only younger brother, Curtis, had sick children (four sick boys, y'all pray for them!) so his family wasn't there. But it was still a huge crowd for a not so huge house.

As you can imagine, the amount of food is mind boggling. It is a good way to start the year. Family, food, fun, and this year there was also singing. Most in the family like to sing. It is one of those things in conservative Mennonite settings. People learn to sing well in 4-part harmony. It is learned at school, at church, and often at home too. It is pretty amazing actually.

I know a lot of people are saying this, but 2017 was a hard year for me. My health has been bad. The pain levels have increased. I have almost constant nausea. It has just been rough. I feel broken and worn down. Chronic pain tends to wear you down on an emotional level. I still have all of the support I have had through my family, but I am struggling. I trust God, that He knows best. I know He could heal me or lead us to the right doctors and treatments. I want to be one of those amazing people who goes through years of pain and can praise God for the experience, but I am just not there. "Lord I believe, help Thou my unbelief." sums up my life right now.

Welcome 2018! I have chosen a word, or maybe 2,  for this year that I want to focus on. I am going to save that for another post. This one is long enough, so I'll share it with you tomorrow. Besides it deserves a post of its own.

I am taking up my 365 project, meaning 1 photo per day, goal again this year. You can follow those posts here.

December 26

It is December 26. Keith is back at work. Douglas ran to Walmart to pick up a couple of my prescriptions before running Freeland to work at Chick-Fil-A. Freeland has his work clothes in the washer and is cleaning up the kitchen while Casper, Annika, and Eliana are doing their morning chores, admittedly they are still in their pajamas, but it is Christmas vacation, after all.

My 5 favorite gifts! 

Yesterday was a sweet day. We had a {barely} white Christmas, which we were all hoping for. The gifts were exceptionally fun to give this year. We were very careful and intentional about getting the perfect gift for each child. Casper got a VR headset and was super impressed with it. I knew he would be. Freeland got a punching bag. He has wanted one for a long time. Annika got a huge stuffed fox, it has been her dearest heart's desire since she saw it several months ago. His name is Nick, and he is already part of the family. Eliana got a huge art set with lots of fun pieces. Of course there were other gifts, but those were the ones I was most excited to give. Douglas got sort of boringish gifts, but he is getting to be such an adult that it is just the way it goes I guess.

My favorite Chrismas morning picture. Seriously, LOOK AT HIM!!

I put together a video for my parents that you can see here if you are interested. This is my family. My oldest sister's family is not represented here, I need to get some pictures from her and I'l add them, but the rest of us are all represented here.

As the children get older I tend to pull them all a little closer. Our years of our whole family being home with no other obligations may be limited. When I think about that I have difficulty breathing.

Casper made each of us a pillowcase. He chose emoji fabric for Annika, she is quite pleased with it.

We opened gifts with oven mitts on Christmas Eve just for fun.

I'm thinking about blogging and how much this little blog has evolved through the years. It started as a place to document our adoption of Eliana from China. That was more than six years ago. It has documented our life since then, my photography journey, my thoughts and feelings as well as the everyday happenings. My work with Superkids is documented here, my trips to China and Taiwan are all here. My health crash is all outlined here, my diagnosis, my chronic pain. And hopefully the faithfulness of God is seen woven throughout the whole thing.

God has been stirring my heart. I have stories to tell. Stories of pain, stories of children I have met, stories of miracles I have seen. He has been laying on my heart the need to tell those stories. I don't know exactly where this will go, but I'm going to start here. It only seems right. So expect a few changes here over the next few weeks.

Merry Christmas!!

Merry Christmas from the Martins!