Silence

I am sitting in a silent house.  Hannah and I arrived home after mid-night last night.  Our crazy delays and adventures will make a great blog post sometime, but right now the house is quiet.  My mind is not.  Keith and the children have not yet arrived back home from the trip they took while I was gone.  Bless Keith, I know he will be glad to get home too!

I got up a bit ago and made some food.  I was so hungry after the long day traveling.  I brought it back to bed and am lounging here intermittently eating, thinking, and writing.  my mind wanders back through the days.  I smile at some memories, I cry at others.  But my mind keeps coming back to one day, one child, one moment.  It was such an overwhelming moment for me that haven't been able to tell you about it, but...

I think I'm ready to tell you about "Samson".  We met him last year.  He was so tiny and helpless, he was struggling to live with a serious heart condition.  The memory of handing him back to his nanny and walking away is forever seared in to my memory.  None of us expected him to survive long enough to get the surgery he so desperately needed.  We got little updates for a while.  We knew that Gongzhan got him moved to a hospital in Shanghai.  But then we didn't really hear much.  We asked, but there were no clear answers.  I prayed for this baby.  As I lay on the sofa sick I prayed for him.  When I couldn't sleep at night I prayed for him.  And I loved him from afar, comforting myself that he mattered to someone.  We heard that they had been unable to operate on his heart, I prepared myself to hear that he didn't survive the year.

Soon after we walked in to the orphanage where he lives, they carried a baby boy in.  He was tiny and frail looking.  Could it be him?!  I didn't even want to hope.  I tried to piece his information together the whole time we were there.  He had a scar from a heart surgery, he was the right age, etc., etc.  Finally it was his turn to be evaluated.  It was him!  My miracle boy!

I always try not to cry in orphanages no matter what I see, the children don't need the added burden of a weeping adult.  But that time I cried.  And I cried again as I once more handed him back to the nanny.  He is still frail.  He needs a family.  He needs medical care.  But he is alive, and that is enough for now!

We were talking about what advocacy name to give him, and Mark Melson suggested Samson.  We all thought it was so fitting for this little one!  God has certainly been this little one's strength!  Will you join me in praying for his health and safety?